Archive for the ‘life on the road’ Category

A new to me “revelation”… NM

Friday, October 26th, 2018

“There is no glory in climbing a Mountain if all you want to do is to get to the top. It’s experiencing the climb itself, in all its moments of revelation, heartbreak and fatigue. That has to be the goal.” 
~ Karyn Kusama ~

Back to Alamogordo! Random photos of a beautiful evening in “White Sands” National Park.

A week or so ago I decided it was grand time for a road trip between medical appointments. Totally excited to finally explore Santa Fe and it’s surroundings. Not camping as already too cold for my blood but an inexpensive [$30 a night!] AirBnB. The reviews were good [aren’t they always?] and a good place to sleep at the same time in a country desert type setting about 30 minutes south of town. Change of clothes, meds, food for backup including hummus, brioche bread and bagels, Ghee, “Bonne Maman” preserves, my own drinking water from my Berkey filter, potato salad, more, old habits never die. Nothing wrong as the 220 miles in the Jeep listening to my various preferred Artists were playing out loud for a change, obeying the speed limit as I am a bit heavy on the gas pedal, the main reason I sold the John Cooper Works before going to jail or killing myself, I arrived at my destination welcomed by my gracious Host.

The next day was downtown Santa Fe, the space called “The Plaza” and I applied for “a stranger in a strange land”. I was displaced but this was not the first time as I had not lived on the road all my Life and was in previous past an Urban person. Nonchalant without forgetting to feed the parking meter I strolled up and down the streets fairly empty that day, I would call it more window shopping realizing that anything in Santa Fe was out of my reach to purchase. I got lucky finding a lunch special [Fajitas] for seven dollars, the highlight of my day. My potato salad and even hummus were starting to get pretty boring. A drive up “Hyde Memorial” National Forest and State Park at 9000+ feet took up another couple hours before returning… to “my room”.

As I settled to rest my spine, my decision was already made. It came out of nowhere. I was going to cut the trip short by a day and return home the next morning. Home? Since when did I miss a “Home”? It happened so fast that I had to slow down my thoughts process. Have we been Spirit and I on the road too long? Or just long enough to now stop and literally enjoy this what I call “my resting place”? Alamogordo itself does not have much to offer. The big conveniences for me is being close to three grocery stores and a mile away from the hospital and Drs offices. The icing of it all are the mountains, those forest roads covering five counties, roads I have not even explored 1/100th of them. I am minutes away from 9000 feet, even shorter if I start at the dirt road a couple miles from here. I can breathe on those roads, I can stop, I can admire and meditate. I can sit by that ancient tree where I spread Lance’s, my Mother’s and Spirit’s ashes and replay a whole lifetime in slow motion. I can feel “fortunate” being here in the now.

On my way up and later on obviously on my way down, the snowbirds were outnumbering the cars. It is the migration south running away from the cold into a Fall which I think we missed while jumping into Winter without much of a break. RV’s and campers of all sizes, new and old while most also trailering a car, some as a convoy with a camper and a trailer behind their trucks, a few motorcycles loaded up with the riders I am sure hoping none of the bungee cords holding their life’s possesions would snap, moving villages on their way to the winter warmer states. Just as we had over and over done in years past. My big surprise within myself was the fact that there was no envy, even “jealousy” even though I have never been a jaleous person but it is a good descriptive word. There was no “I wish it was us”… None at all. The hardships of the road instead constantly replayed.

You have no idea how many times I have heard “I wish we could do what you are doing”! Yes, the payoff being full time on the road especially when NOT going from campground to campground and RV Park to RV Park but instead utilize freely BLM lands and National Forests can be harsh and demanding. What am I saying! It is harsh and demanding. The rules exist and if strayed from them Life can turn into a small hell! There is the mechanical aspect of our vehicles. Where would I fix “it” if it broke? There is the looking over the shoulders while the free lands have changed and more and more populated by the homeless and bluntly put by many thieves and drug addicts. There are the locations, the ones we have to choose in case of bad weather. The question always “will I be able to get out if we got flooded?”. Sandwiches are of many as too often while going from point A to point B there is no time to cook. The same applies when in between those two points! Where will we spend the night? Walmart parking lot? Hospital parking lot? In front of a garage as long as we leave early? I was comfy in my Jeep… I had a home waiting for me… I did not want any part of all of this anymore. That was my inner surprise, as the word “strange” surfaced.

I had never been happier when I arrived home and parked under my carport. Unlocked the door and “voila”… That was it. Unpacking could wait for the next day for sure. Could all this be actually be mine? Not as a physical possession I was thinking, but a mental stability of the moment, a calm in my mind and thoughts while making sure the mountains were still in my sight. They were… This does not mean I will never camp again. It does not mean I will never go away. These days were a wake up call to make me look a bit further than my nose as they say.

A few days have passed and the colors are brighter, the space more welcoming than ever. Even the food tastes better! The mountains look taller. I sat on the patio and watched the almost full Moon come up from the crests playing hide and seek with the clouds and while being Sunset time everything else turned red. My Life’s book has not yet seen the end but it is definitely into a new chapter. I am happy being here. As happy as I am going to be which is what I reply when asked. The good memories have taken over these moments and the giant step called “acceptance” is now only a thin and narrow breach in this ground I am standing on. It is not anymore if I enjoyed Santa Fe or not, it is much more than that. A surprised realization what my Life has come to.

The evening Prize!

Stay well, Ara and Spirit