“Growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional”

I realize that I should have never stopped scribbling on these pages. For my own sake! For my Friends, my acquaintances. It was, has been a great communication channel. Yes. Selfish thought? No. Simply survival. Survival of the fittest, not necessarily physically for sure but more mentally then ever. Unwanted news keeps dropping as the turmoiled leaves of the Fall, but the colors these days are dimmer. Just news which makes me wonder what an even further timeframe has in store for me. All it is really without getting into a Philosophical debate “aging”…

Physically It has been all about the spine lately! Again. Actually not again as that painful dilemma never took a break but now worse, impossible to ignore throughout daily functions. Recently, more tests. Including one which they dye the bones and take pictures of the body in all the positions possible so the Neuro Surgeon can see a good map of the traffic, figure out where the bottlenecks are. He did. A loose rod. Couple bones rubbing against each other. The puzzle has started missing more substance than in years past. Yet, as a hurtle, my Cardiac History is closing the door to any further surgery while I was also told that it is only going to get worse. Thank You Very Much…

I have to call this period as I called many others “The Comedy of Life”! Think about it. We are on this giant stage with all more or less natural props and we are all actors. Seeing the daily Life taking place under such a lens is even at time hysterically funny and sad all at the same time.

Example? I had a sale transaction not long ago. Selling a brand new helmet and motorcycle Jacket to an acquaintance and even though I had sent some photos of said helmet, he thought it was a different brand. A more expensive one. I was then on accused of ripping him off as also a few other choice words totally out of context. My Life’s door is bolted shut from any negativity that could even pass through the cracks. Was it I have a thin skin or thick skin? which were some of the words I read. I forget, while all I remember is thanking him for this Comedy Play he was the main actor and myself a distant spectator not willing to engage. “The Comedy of Life”!!! That was a good short play.

Why am I sharing this story? Because all I see, feel, observe around me is plain and simple an unrealistic reality. I am not within Nature anymore. Only in bursts once or twice a week. Do you think that as I wrote 74 on my Calendar the other day, that I am going to plunge in someone else’s theatrical endeavors? Nope…. Never. Those who remember us [R.I.P. Spirit] know that my favorite daily getaway is my Cocoon. A mental one, a physical one. I always have managed to have a cover throughout the years whether a sailboat, a tent, a yurt, today what I call my little Cabin! This 750 square feet dwelling I share with my buddy “Ghost”. Another gift Life decided to give me or was it Spirit who had enough seeing me alone? I think it was him.

Of course there is also a story behind him. Aren’t there always? I will tell you.

I was driving through Ruidoso on a mid day Saturday, Capitan was my destination. On my left, in the Pizza Hut parking lot I noticed a big tent, crates, dogs and cats. Or maybe there was not cats. I needed some dog time and through the incessant flow of the weekend cars I managed to make a U turn and enter the lot while parking in the rear. Yes! Many dogs… “Ruidoso Humane Society” was having an outdoor affair and Pizza Hut was kind enough to furnish them with an open space and even…. Pizzas! I sat by the communal table with boxes of Pizza staring at me, and a beautiful Pit Bull reminding me of Spirit showed up. Pure white, one black eye, a puppy I could not even hold its leash pulling with a few G forces. Time passed, gentled a few, I was getting a generous dog time when this little guy showed up and jumped on my lap with those eyes staring at me. Oh! The handler says “his name is “Ghost”…”. As I go “Seriously?”. “And look” as she goes on, he has a Heart design on his ear…”. Could this be? Was there a possible clearer message at that moment? I did not think so….

I still had to ask questions. He was 5 months old! At 74 did I, could I really start over with a puppy? He was brought in with two siblings which were quickly adopted but obviously no one wanted him. The Humane Society in Ruidoso socializes their dogs, bathe them, spend time with them. It is not a City Shelter. It is clean and immaculate. They drive them around once a month. Again the question arises “a Puppy?”! but… Dogs pick us, don’t they. I was told he did well in a car, in a crate, no damage in his condo. Has all his shots and was chipped for the low fee of $65!

Next thing you know, I have a Puppy on my passenger seat coming home with me and that is when once again, a four legged Human changed my Life around.

I would never say one particular dog has been/is the best throughout my years. They are all the best for that particular stage passing by. Lady Tascha was such an incredible creature throughout my sailboat years. Spirit? What a dog!!! Camping for 14 years? Faithful eyes and soul focused on me 24/7! three hundred thousand miles or so in his sidecar devouring the endless sights and smells. Spirit will always be the “King of the Outdoors”, and as I call him often “The Dog”.

Ghost and I have been together now for about 9 months. He has turned one more or less. From his first day here I waited for some damage, one way or another. Never. From his first day his one parent being an Australian Shepard, he has never stopped working filled with an overflowing love while I also need to add “an incredible patience” as I am not anymore the one that jumps out of bed or move as fast as I use to. I often think “what did I do to deserve him?”. My only concern quite often is his intelligence superior to mine! I don’t know how he knows ahead of me my next moves, but he does. I never thought I would say this, but I already miss him being a puppy. He was such a great one while now I call him a “Juvenile delinquent”… He is always within my vicinity, loves to lay next to me, his head on my shoulder or on my lap still at 37lbs, and since he bought his new watch his eyes five inches from mine staring every morning at 6am. But he is not as I call them “a Velcro dog”. He is perfect. He makes me laugh throughout the day! How would you react to those eyes beaming on you constantly?

This feels like a rehabilitation to my Journal tip toing through its main entrance. I missed it but the times were never quite right to before turn that knob. The balance was never there. It has taken me such a long time to adapt to a Life which unlike previous ones “I did not chose”.

Yes! Aging can be and is such a process I must say! Many unknowns suddenly pop up. Some, surprisingly so good and some, well, could do without! But isn’t it Life as such in general?

Stay well, as always

Ara and Ghost
[RIP Spirit 04/04/2018]

This entry was posted on Friday, July 15th, 2022 at 8:28 am and is filed under Alamogordo, Cloudcroft, dogs, Forest, Journal, New Mexico, travel, spirituality, pit bull, sidecar, motorcycle, cooking, photography, riding, homeless. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.