Archive for 2022

74 and counting…

Thursday, September 1st, 2022

“Don’t regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many”

These days are, following the expression, “something else”! I could also say “a totally different ball game”… I mean seriously, the curtain has dropped and the conversations with Friends are what would have been unimaginable just a few years ago. Crazy… Crazy.

35 + years separates those two chairs…. Progression of comfort!

It has been a slow progression, I think, and suddenly not long ago as I wrote “74” on my paper calendar, for that particular day, again, I took a step back and the weight of those years sagged my shoulders… and my mind! I continuously asked myself if there was even a single thread of reality associated with that number? That fact, that realization is mind boggling to me. So I have to tap on my shoulder, stand up straight while hearing myself saying a faint “Bravo”. I cannot help it, it is an accomplishment. As I have to add without the need of a pedestal “I am a young 74…”! What a joke!!! right?

Today’s play on today’s stage has been sneaking up slowly with no warnings. Just a little red flag here and there not paying much attention. One step after another I realized I am no more battling taking those uphill steps on this slippery Mountain we call Life. What were “Valleys and Peaks” are now “prairies and nicely eroded hills”. It is pretty straight forward. The rocky dirt roads are pretty much paved instead. It is amazing! I laugh!

I have a very patient dog. Incredibly patient while probably intelligent enough to realize he does not have much of a choice. The morning stage is painful. Memories of jumping out of a sleeping bag? Sleeping on the ground… are you kidding? It is instead sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for that altered spine to slowly realign itself while the arthritis slowly induces my acceptance without a choice. Oh! it takes a while. I laugh some more. It is always that Postcard Life has mailed me. A split image with only two words “Now” and “Then”… That partition becoming more and more distinct as time goes by.

I learned the “shuffle”! Music missing I have mastered how to get to the kitchen for that magical cup of coffee. My morning drug, my addiction, no need for therapy or counseling, it is too late for that while my first pain pill of the day follows! The alarm is set. There will be alarms throughout the day all with different ring tone which hopefully I will remember what they are for. There are alarms when I am cooking! Yes, timers while throughout my professional Life had never been used. Rarely, only for pastries. Those intense and complex recipes which I cannot even indulge these days. What an irony! I have taken the safe route now after a couple “burn outs”! They became too common. I found the solution. I can at least have different ring tones. Beats those past timers with annoying sounds. I find it hysterical! Master Chef using timers… Whatever works. One might ask why I laugh at those situations as much as I do. I have always liked true effortless comedy. I feel fortunate I find all this, for lack of better word, funny! Todays pain and effort compared to the past effortless scenarios. I will not cry about it all. As always my favorite quote “It is what it is”… Just wanted to clarify.

One of the most intriguing aspect, for lack of better word, are my phone conversations with Friends. I can only call them “Comedy”. It is no more the 300 mile ride I took just to have Breakfast and come back that same morning. Nothing has nothing to do with the substance of past “more youthful conversations”. Today? Discussions of aches and pains, Drs visits, medications only growing in numbers, diet [???] and of course our favorite “how many times do we get up throughout the night to pee…”. No conversation is complete without checking that box.

Nuts! I was just telling a Dear Friend of mine not long ago “remember the two of us sitting in your backyard in the evenings about 25 years ago?” If “those” conversations would have been today’s, well, I would have said that you are nuts! Impossible. Only when we finally have divulged our complete medical history that we can rest at ease and finish our conversation.
We compare our lounging throughout the days. And what time is the best for naps? I love my naps! Now I do. There has been this sense of “guilt” present for a long time regarding what I often call these “nothing days” which truly are the culmination of a Lifelong “project”. I hear from Friends that I should pick up a new hobby. It always sounds like work and a huge disruption of the flow I am mostly enjoying these days. Some try to make me feel guilty! Which I did for a while but no more. I have lived such a busy Life, while I should, could, write a couple more big volume books, that today the guilt has gone. It is no one else’s Life but mine, it is the fruit of those years enjoying them today my way the best I can. It goes hand in hand with acceptance. No sense anymore trying to crack my head against that impossible wall called “time”.

I have been on a plant based diet for a while. It had originally nothing to do with my Health but how low quality meat is around here in any shape or form. I also know the steps it goes through until it arrives on the store’s shelves. If you really want to know, you can watch on Netflix “Eating our way to extinction”. Not for the faint of heart for sure, it is all honestly documented, but I have never been the Ostrich with its head in the sand. I am however not a purist! I do eggs and a bit of milk, A bit of cheese and probably a couple other items. No processed food per say, no salt and no sugar. And so much of it takes time preparing while I enjoy my kitchen! Immensely. This little triangle work area where the flow is perfect. Sink, prep surface and stove, all in succession with a double layer of foam I stand on which allow the spine to be a bit more quiet. Why would I need a new hobby? And that includes making treats for Ghost. At least I know what is in them… Pumpkin~Peanut Butter~ Flour. That is it. Freeze and use as needed. I can share the measurements if anyone is interested. One batch goes a long way. I even still roast my own Coffee Beans. Back to that morning and early afternoon cup! Nothing like it…. unless you have a Coffee Roaster shop near you and are willing to pay $18 a pound.

74! What a surprise…

And now, I am looking forward to 75! Only because I will be able to say that I have lived three quarters of a Century which I think has more weight than just the number 75!!!