“My Personal Daily Therapy, published Weekly or so…”
“Those who dwell among the beauties and mysteries of the Earth are never alone or weary of Life”
~ Rachel Carson ~
“Van Morrison”… He could be here in Death Valley singing “The Mystery” from his Album “Poetic Champion Composes”.
I could not make a dash to Furnace Creek. The stage was just too alarming in it’s curtains of clouds with their doors barely ajar letting the sun rays peaking through, the mountains in their haze of different intensities as a collage spaced out one behind another from darker to lighter all offset in their silhouettes. The road as a dark ribbon amongst it all losing it’s trace ahead of the murky horizon. What a welcome it was as I now sit here in the dark, all sights are gone and resting for the night till sunrise again awakes such scenery. We are stealth camping as I now call it, meaning free, meaning parked where we should not be. Away from it all as dirt roads are here of many.
It is quiet and only the cool wind is talking tonight in this total darkness. The walls have crumbled as only Mother Nature’s true face as always keeps us company. Death Valley. I call it the Valley of Life. So vast and rugged. So many peaks and valleys. The snow is up, the warmth is down, down here where we now are.
I know it is early. The phone is showing 5am. The time change has awaken me earlier than ever compounded with a wind that would just not quit. No plans, no plans, I keep telling myself as we are this barely alike grain of sand within this vast space. Right now, it is simply making some coffee. I can then think on for the day.
The immensity of this space overwhelms me. This is how Earth was so long ago, this is how today it is unchanged only from the harshness of the elements. We have been lucky to arrive in these warmer winter times, the mildest ever recorded in the meteorological times of Death Valley. I had always kept a step back when here previously. This time around I am here to adventure ourselves within the empty spaces where others do not stay and yet in good measure avoiding the more rugged terrains we would get in trouble with. Quiet and more quiet all has been, even on this Holiday Weekend I was not aware of.
How strange it is, we have been within much isolated spaces before, yet, this stage I have to admit is intimidating. Could it because we are by ourselves? Could it be one’s sight here can only see vastness where I know a break down would be of not such a good option? I feel far from everything, physically and mentally. The stage has not warmed up yet. It has no become as familiar as Valley of the Gods or Big Bend or others.
Panamint Dunes, like a default out of the ground they emerge in their lighter color contrasted by the mounts of lava near by. No one is here as yet the main road is not too far. I was awaiting for snow, bitter cold, we instead are enjoying the mild heat. It feels like spring, but it is not. There is no connection here, it is odd to be as such, detached and falling back into myself. I feel as I am putting on an increasing distance between us and the rest of the World. I feel maybe I sank myself into a deeper connection of a path that is what my mind needs, what my soul requires. This is getting back in touch with myself, always this need to not loose the deep texture of this path.
We took on the main road today for Panamint Campground to top off our water from a spring well. There was an RV parked. She was driving. He could barely walk with his cane while trying to lock the doors. His gray hair blowing in the wind, step by step struggling. Will this be me in a few years? I started wondering what will be my options? The solitude of Death Valley brought on my own solitude, my Human solitude. I don’t think there is nowhere else where I have felt so alone and yet so surrounded by such magnitude from Mother Nature. Questions, incessant questions. What for? That bridge is not yet here. We are still on solid ground. So far.
The Sun is disappearing, the land has warmed up to us tonight as the view is endless. The Valley and now the peaks drawn within their shade has been appeasing after this calm day. Another calm day settling in after being a bit unsettled. Too many questions are arising these past times. Having a hard time grasping the moment. Such a vast stage is bringing on incessant memories of Lance as here time has stopped moving forward. There is no movements but us, silence as never before prevails, there is no side roads where the mind can wonder. Only flourishing from deep below the same questions about this Life living. Why isn’t here someone else just like me to share the tenderness of such thoughts. Share the visions, the sights, correlate the senses unified helping each other when the depths suddenly are of changing colors.
Day after day as a quest becoming at times questionable, time moves on. The beauty of Nature holds me up, sometimes not. Too alone maybe needing another soul alike living above the needless mundane stage. Dreams of sharing suddenly. Wondering why. Why now? I feel it all being about sharing the wealth of the path as I known it is a wealth. But it comes with a price. Beware. The price is of a nomadic Life embraced with no looking back as even if I did the key of the past Life mode is lost not to be found. The price is big and yet so small when such wealth enters the path. No walls, no commodities, the ground is the comfort, Mother Nature is the forever land lady and the rent due daily is always collected.
In my effort to stay on the road “we” now have a T Shirt and Merchandise store. I think you will like it.
It is called “SpiritedOasis”.
Photos and Digital downloads are on “Smugmug”.
The recipes are on the “One-Pan Recipe” section. They free downloads, contributions are gladly accepted.
We both appreciate your support and hoping we are giving something back.
Be well, always.
Ara and Spirit