“From now, practice saying to everything that appears unpleasant: ‘You are just an appearance and by no means what you appear to be’” ~ Epictetus ~
Another Sunset to enjoy. No camera, I will not do that tonight. This is one to savor within the deep memories of this space. Sometimes such is needed. There is a forecast for thunderstorms but all I see are a few clouds cooling down quickly the afternoon high temperatures. Almost 100 today again and only few bursts of winds perhaps when the spirits present decided to move on. Much writing today. It is getting very interesting reading back some of my past words. I wonder at times if it really was us. I feel fortunate to have been writing for myself.
I failed miserably. I just had to grab the camera. There was fire behind those clouds as the ones behind me slowly from their crest down turning from shades of crimson to gray. There were images in the clouds, I saw a Unicorn flying away. There are plenty of birds around this time even though I am not feeding them. This must be their last tune of the day before letting the crickets take center stage. A new moon, a thin sliver of light has appeared like magic as it was prepping all day. This is the daily show here at "The Oasis".
We went to Terlingua yesterday. A Friend of mine was going to play the guitar on the Porch as I was sure many others would be present. It did not happen. Since the Starlight Theatre Restaurant has been closed the crowds have thinned out and the tourists are also non existent. It won’t be long before reopening. Terlingua without it is just not itself. My Friend Jim will be here Wednesday. That is October 13th, Lance’s Birthday. 33. I am generally alone on those days, needless to say they are tougher days than most, but I like Jim and I think his company will be very much a propos. He writes songs, he will bring his guitar, he will play, I will cook, take photos most likely and we will sit around the Fire as his Spirituality and mine fall always into long conversations.
Not a single day seems to be alike the other. I suddenly been on edge with this day approaching. So all is not always cheerful, such is Life I keep thinking, making the best of it. One gets used to it I guess and yet even if and when sadness attains it’s momentum, I still feel a certain exhilaration only because I am still able to feel, such an important aspect of my own Life. I don’t know much anymore how others live, it seems it has been a long time being separated from the real World as every time I confront it every which way I turn I can only run away from the inner storm created with no reprieve.
How strange to be alive and remain with the constant touch of one’s memory. The one, that instant when 33 years ago, this little ball of flesh, yes, screaming, came out into this World none of us then knowing the future as I must say the years passed were good. I do have those times to be thankful for. I know that. I also feel today that those are the years that deserve a change, a certain change from the path of my own past four years. I don’t know what it would be yet, Life on the road cannot stop, it is truly too late to come back, but a variance is needed. An interesting change, inward and outward. I don’t know what else to call it but it will come to me, I feel it.
I look around me and I see through it all. So much is, as “Epictetus” said, just an appearance. Today I will create my own appearance, Lance will be here with me as so often he is, but today he will stay a while longer. “Happy Birthday Lance”, I know you are reading this as I read you and feel you. Always. Yes, you are “The Oasis of my Soul”.
Be Safe and Well
Peace, Love, Courage
Ara & Spirit