Archive for February, 2010

A Crystal web… TX

Thursday, February 25th, 2010

“Keep Love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring.”
~ Oscar Wilde ~


It’s 24 degrees this morning in Alpine. It wears it’s name well, and as we are on our way to the Dentist, in Valentine this time, there is about 3 inches of snow. We managed to make it to Mc Donald’s, it is for breakfast the last refuge, and the snow has stopped falling. There is a car in the parking lot, it is running, the fumes are amplified like a crater from the cold, no one is in it, obviously the owner wants to keep it warm, where else could this happen? I like Alpine, it is a “cool” town. No punt intended. A few tables away an elderly couple is also having breakfast. They must be in their late 70’s and certainly have been together for at least 50 years. They are all bundled up, he is just eating his pancakes, his stare is far but he is close to her. She is on her cell phone catching up with their family on this cold early morning. She is a little women with a burgundy wool hat, there is a radiance to her. Round face and glasses slipping down her nose are just so perfect in harmony with her vivacious conversation everyone can hear. Her eyes are rolling, they are small and blue, the sparks make up for their size, her smile is of sunshine. She is not here, she is there. They are so comfortable with each other, it is so obvious they are street smart, they are not from here, they have been doing this for a while and joined at the hip as so much in unison they form one. I am enjoying watching them. They are what I am not.


I saw a very thin crystal string the other day. Almost invisible, right in front of my eyes, slanted only inches away. It glistened a bit by the sunlight. It held everything together so strongly by nature and yet so delicate and so could be shuttered if only twisted and pulled and bumped a bit here or there. I saw more of them, they formed a web, it surrounded me. The above couple’s web seemed so strong, so solid, as mine only myself alone feels still yet so brittle. They knew they way around as much as my own becomes often so tentative. These past days disclosing the Movie’s ongoing so totally mentally drained me out so ready for a step backwards when all should only be going forward. Nothing though shattered, the scales maybe tilted a bit, swaying right and left as today all seem again well balanced and the web took a step backward leaving me ahead a bit away from it’s possession.


We made it to the Dentist. I wonder how late we will be here as the thoughts of the roads freezing on our way back, specially the one uphill passed Alpine is on my mind. I guess it would not matter to mention it, would it really matter in a Dr’s Office? So I did mention it. It won’t be long she said from behind the safety of a double glass window. I wonder why Dr’s always run late? They could never be Chefs for sure as I can see them running about two hours behind on each course. So I sat back after checking on Spirit again. There is a mother sitting next to me and her toddler is screaming laying on her shoulder. She is on the phone all at the same time without a care for her neighbors. Her cheek is holding the phone precariously against her other shoulder, her hands are patting with no true meaning the tiny child unhappy from the inattention he is subjected to.  How can she even hear her own conversation? The father is sitting ten  feet away, he has dark sunglasses on and is smiling. His own stare must be beyond these walls the dark lenses giving him the much needed protection of his indifference. I know it will be  another hour past my given appointment time over a month ago. We need a pay back program where the patient can also charge their time for the waste of waiting. After all, it is the Doctor driving the "chrome hummers”, not us… ( not that I would care to!).


I don’t do very well within the real world anymore. Everything seems more and more disrespectful. Other’s time used and abused has no more meaning I notice every time I am off my trail. I will give it one hour, then I will leave. All the fuel wasted along 240 miles. It is a matter of principle. Maybe if the weather was good it would be different, but it is not and Spirit is waiting outside. I just spoke with others waiting and I am trying to do the math. It is 3pm, I am the 2:30pm, however the 2pm has not yet been seen. It only means one thing… Very very late… Frozen roads…


We are now back. And so I was wrong. It was not long till I myself was laying on the chair inside under the good care given. I think the weather had supplied me with enough lee way to imagine it all. I like being wrong, I use to dislike it, we are programmed to like being right. Being wrong is always a new chapter in this book called the “learning curve”. A little bit of grinding with what seemed a powerful Dremel tool, some impressions with some not so good tasting quick hardening rubber such consistency “stuff” and now I am free till March the 12th to roam around if the weather ever lifts it’s temperatures a bit.


As I close this page the power so Sunshine has again filled me up. There is noting like it. The crystal web I do not see wondering if crystal would let?

Another day on the road, on the this sinuous Journey. “It’s all good”

Till next time, you be well, always, it is our best choice.

Ara & Spirit

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