We are here today… no… not gathered… but in the center of this vast incredible space. We arrived around noon and the spot that I had checked out was empty, as there are 5 campers on this 17 mile stretch I also had plan B. Learned about plan B long time ago. So I am not going to get emotional, somehow I think I have to be "stoic", and then again why should I? I am only human… Land moves me, its history, its geology, geography, the thoughts going back as who lived here… the villages… the good times and the bad times. This has to be the culmination, the peak of our Journey. This is where "my" and "self" are one united, this is "now" more than ever, this is where it all ends and this is where it all begins. As we came back from a little ride witnessing the sunset and getting to know a bit better the lay of the land, the moon almost full projected my shadow ahead taller than real Life. It is only a form, a physical aspect as so much even taller is the mind here.
I feel privileged being here, more than any other place. I did not sleep very well however, there is such silence that I can hear my breathing and the ringing in my ears. I woke up a few times, I normally do not remember my dreams but every time my eyes opened up I could see the remains of men in blue and natives in deer skin clothe and long black hair in a constant battle. And how strange as it puts a weight on this space and makes me wonder what has happened in the past. Maybe I can find out.
I was born in France, I lived in Europe and other parts of the World for about 24 years before "being sent" here… and I always felt very comfortable living in this country, always more on the West Coast than on the East Coast. I still debate within myself about the ramifications of believing about an after Life. Which of course means also a before Life. I have read a lot about it, there is some sense in the Spirit lingering on as truly not a physical form, only borrowing one. I have always thought that I "have" lived on the land of this country before, back when Cowboys and Native Indians roamed their own path and always had in mind that I was a Native here. Not a fantasy, not a make believe thought, just a hunch.
We did come to Utah last year, camped north of St George, and as much as I wanted to come here I was avoiding it knowing that as winter was approaching at the time, we would stay here for a while. We have that "while" now and maybe, only maybe, I have been here before as I feel so rooted to this particular land, it sights, as you can see in the pictures… all around us.
What can one think when this is what the senses are exposed to? We are in the middle of the Valley, on high grounds in case of rain, Lat 37 17 13.9 Long 109 48 43.4, and time again has gotten away from us. The colors keep changing from the course of the sun throughout its own domain, a bit of haze from the wind going dormant and my only companion I talk to is Spirit.
This can only be good for the "Soul" as nothing else really matters here! What you wear… what you do… rich or poor… you are stripped from it all left alone with your subconscious only, those gears within you that maybe do not mesh as needed, but will within a few days start moving on as a well oiled mind. Stressed out? Bugged down? Life is getting to you? This is the place which will again make you find yourself as never before. There are no reservations taken… it is wide open for your stay as long as you so desire it.
I know that not all the questions that I seek will surface with answers, but I know that we will leave this Valley not as when we came in. Spirit himself is so different and so close when away from any civilization. So much more alert, his eyes glued on me constantly if anytime walking away from him! he takes over the space we camp on in a heartbeat, as soon as we settle that is "his" territory… I feel everyday so fortunate for us to be together, he is just an indescribable Soul… patient, kind hearted, intelligent and a happy one for that!
We came back in the dark last night, I love riding at night as I know this road also pretty well. With just a jacket on and a couple T shirts it was a perfect evening. Not even much sense staying up late as I wanted to catch the sunrise this morning as I barely did.
So there I am this morning, a couple hours ago, Spirit took the picture, reason for him not being in it!… Actually it was cold… Mr Spirit does not get up till it warms up… Not much else to say today… we are staying around here, take a ride again at sunset, a bit of hiking probably, answering some e mails and I also promised myself to get on with the recipes I use to post. Most of them are somewhere in this Blog, I have to find them and insert them in their proper section… Hard to stay in when the weather is so perfect…
Come and visit… coffee is on me!
You be well and stay well… Ara & Spirit
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